There is a church in my soul

There is a church in my soul

Have we ever wondered what the purpose of a religious institution like a church really is? The obvious answer is it is there to promote and safe guard the spirituality within the community and to provide a forum for social interaction. I have been a member of one such community and have contributed more than my might. I have been given to understand that the purpose of any church is more than just a place of worship.
So why would someone want to attend church? Regardless of what is said about churches, people expect that their life problems can be addressed in some fashion or form. With all the weight and pressures of their world weighing down on their minds, people expect the church to provide Bible-based solutions that no other institution can provide. It is expect to integrate the society under its goodwill and graciousness, and this needs to extend beyond the narrow boundaries of the religion. This should in reality create a feeling of oneness.
This is my understanding of the church and the expectation I had of it. However, though saying so is morally incorrect, I have had on countless occasions felt that God has forsaken my church. These were based on the three instances that were shocking. The clergy keeps changing every three years, some of the priests adhering to the diktats of the local church administration. This does not change and hence constantly in the hands of select some. The other have no say whatsoever. Democracy is not a commodity on offer and though your contributions are what feeds the church funds, your equal rights are seldom acknowledged. However it is for the clergy to decide whether to allow officialdom, hold its sway.
During the time of Late Rev Fr K V Mathew, he instructed me to take Sunday School Classes for Senior Boys of the church. Having just cursory knowledge of Bible, I took up the onerous task with some consternation. My acquaintance with Rev Fr Kaattukallil, the then Principal of Mar Ivanios College helped. He was at that time resident at St Mary’s Cathedral. I would go over to him and from Thursdays and prepare for the classes on Sunday. That was the amount of input from my part and the source was none too small. Fr Kaattukallil is currently the Bishop of the Malankara Catholic Diocese of Pathanamthitta.
There are church officials, who feel they have the right to hold sway over all church functions. With the classes going full strength, it was with a bit of annoyance that the class greeted the interruption. One of these officials stepped in without a though and called the class to a halt. Barring one student he called the rest of the class out and took them away to what he mentioned was a youth gathering. This was a shocking instance when I felt that God has no business being in such an unholy gathering. I left Sunday school teaching forever.
The second instance was that of my daughter’s marriage. We belong to the Marthoma diocese community and she was a member of this very church. She was baptized here, was a member of the church choir and an active member among the youth gathering. If anyone deserved consideration to be a member of the congregation, it was her. The occasion was her marriage. The groom was from the Jacobite community. There is a rule that if a marriage is held on a Sunday, a special order has to be procured from the Bishop. The parson of the church Rev Fr Sajan handed me a recommendation letter, which I took to the Rev Bishop Timothios. I paid Rs 1000 and procured the order. However I was told that the letter needs to be held till the engagement is over, as these letters are handed out only after engagement. Rev Fr Sajan in the meantime had been transferred to another church.
During the rounds of invitations, we happened upon the house of one of the church senior administrators. We were told that he had gone to the airport to pick up the new parson. As we were coming out, the man and the new priest arrived. On seeing me, this man said, “Father, this is the Abey I spoke to you about”. Upon hearing this the new priest immediately looked at me and said, “I will not come for the engagement.” Later this priest had the special order cancelled. I chose not to go in for any controversy. I went around to all the church officials to request help, none did. Finally with the help of Dr Chevalier Koshy, to whom I will be eternally indebted, I got my daughter a membership In the St Peters Cathedral of the Jacobite Church.
It is the custom in the community that for three weeks, there will be announcements in the church, when the bride-to-be will be decked up and will kneel in front of the congregation while this happens. My daughter had already purchased the dresses for these announcements. The pain in her mind, the sorrow at being denied, and our sorrow on seeing this still lingers on in the mind. There is not a day in my life when the sheer unfairness that was meted out to my little girl escapes my mind. These are the days when I feel that this is one church without a soul.
2011 May 10.Trivandrum Club witness the miracle of God’s love. When the church denied my girl her dream wedding, her engagement was held in all glory in the presence of some of the leading religious leaders in the state. I had informed all the churches of the sheer unfairness and the grace of God reigned. In attendance were none other than His Beatitude Moran Mor Cardinal Cleemis, Bishop Iranios, Monsignor C Joseph, Very. Rev. Joseph Samuel Karukayil Cor-Episcopa, Monsignor Fr Mathew Manakkarakkavil, Senior Priest in our own Marthoma Church Rev Fr John P Oommen, Fr Bovas Mathew and Fr Wilson Thattathundil and two well-known priest from Jacobite Church, Rev Fr Kuriakose Manalechirayil, and Rev Fr Mathews Manalechirayil. Adding to this were Swami Guru Rathna Jnana Thapaswi, Swami Sookshmananda and the Imam of Palayam Juma Masjid. A true coming together of some of the best known socio- religious leaders. Some eyes surely popped. The marriage was held on the 22nd of the same month at Kumarakam Jacobite Church in Kottayam.
These are the times when God exposes some truths to me. Supporting me as in every other opportunity were very special people, proving that God has nothing to do with religions. And it is in no special order that I mention this. His Beatitude Moran Mor Cardinal Cleemis, Malankara Catholic Church, someone who inspires, support and keeps me going in everything I do, is not of the Marthoma Church where I belong. Mor Gregorios Joseph, the Metropolitan trustee of Jacobite Syrian Christian Church is someone who has been a pillar of strength for me. Gururatna Jnana Thapaswi and Swami Sookshmananda has influenced me so much that to me that the hallowed precincts of Shantigiri is just as much a centre of spirituality to me as is the Thirusannidhi.
It is not to say that my church gave me nothing. It gave me a few great friends. A feeling that I get when I look back is the need of great friends. My friend Santosh John, has been the shoulder I could always rest my tired head and hope for solace and inspiration. Alex Cabat is another of those people who can touch my mind both jovially and in thought provoking manner. Raju Oommen also keeps in touch.
I end this narrative with a few questions. What is the meaning of church community? United Christian Movement (UCM) needs to make distinctions in your everyday deeds and dividing them into Human and Christian, both of which every Christian is. Every human deed will fall into the categories, Human Deeds meaning primal deeds, Christian Deeds ones that are based on the life and teachings of the Lord and Humane Christian deeds that is essentially a reaching out to the society and living in a manner that benefits other humans. Isn’t this the purpose of UCM and all Christian movements? Isn’t the duties all Christian Movements ultimately the same, trying to live life the way Christ wanted us to? And finally isn’t it the duty of all Christian body, church, diocese, congregation the oneness and mutual support of all members?
Much needs answering and a great many have to give answers.